In My Father's Shoes

I'm trying to remember to blink. I'm trying to remember to speak clearly. I am trying to remember to swallow carefully. Walk one foot in front of the other. Don't trip. I'm just so tired but I should stretch and exercise and not get mad. Steady now.

It is a marathon of conscious actions I have to remember now: 26 seconds to 26 minutes to 26 hours to 26 days to 26 months to 26 years. Will I last 26 years? My father lasted 23.

Blink, move, stretch, talk, swallow--carefully, precisely--constantly but I'm so tired already.

This is not bi-polar--Parkinson's is not a disease where I take a pill and pretend I don't have it. If I do--I lose. I lose precious seconds, minutes, hours, days --years.

Friday, I landed in my father's shoes--my tremor of 8 months-Parkinson's.

Blink, move, stretch, talk, swallow--carefully, precisely--constantly.

I'm trying to remember to breathe.